As a continuation of my post last night. I guess I am writing because I am sick of life and nearly all there is to do with it. I do have a wonderful family that loves me unconditionally. Truth be told if it wasn't for them I would not endure the daily hassle of life any longer.
Savannah and I have continued to see each other on and off since August 2013 when we made our big split. We discussed moving back in together a couple of times and made plans to do so around the time of my surgery. She stayed over nearly every day for 3 weeks and a few days before my surgery we made love for the first time in awhile due to me having worn a catheter for a couple months. Before we could even go to sleep she was asking if "I was talking to or seeing anyone" this woman will never change. I mean seriously... I was "out of commission" for a couple months and she was here every night for 3 weeks and to then pop off and ask that.... Will she ever change?
Anyway about to weeks ago and after countless arguments of her lack of trust (that's my opinion) we decided to not see each other anymore. We have texted and talked a few times but nothing serious. In the last couple of weeks I have been talking to someone I played words with Friends with. Here we go........... She is Married, trying to get separated, etc etc etc. We've talked on the phone 2 or 3 times, and she had me install Tango on my phone and we text regularly. Until tonight that is.......... She informed me she couldn't use tango anymore because it linked to her contact list on her phone. I only got brief responses through FB messaging so I am assuming she was caught. I guess it's my big heartedness but I feel so bad for the situation she is in.
(((TO: The person reading this who knows who I am: I'm sure you've seen my FB activity so please do not say anything to this person about me or my blog. I honestly don't think you would but I am mentioning it just in case))).
The depressing part of this "getting to know someone else" is that I am really not my normal self with the pain and walking issues. I am like a young pup chasing a rabbit as I wouldn't know what to do if I caught it. This woman is apparently well off from pics I've seen, or at least her hubby is. Very active and much better looking than I feel I would do well with. So I've lived a small fantasy in my mind but don't expect to be able to fulfill it in anyway.
So now I am sitting all alone, watching movies and writing this blog. I Contemplate what and why things happen to people. I have lost all I considered to be important in the past and doubt very seriously I will ever have it again. For the moment I will continue on, praying things get better, trying to be positive and trying not to dwell on the past..........
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